On My Own
by Cute Gallifreyan
Summary: [one Shot Postdoomsday]Using the lyrics from the play Les Mis. Rose's thoughts and feelings of being on her own without the Doctor. Rose 10th angstyness and fluff


**A/N: I have always wanted to do a song based fic before. I am using the song, On My Own, from Les Mis, to express the feelings of Rose who is now stuck on a parallel Earth without the Doctor and truly is: **_**On her Own…. **_

**Credit goes to Cameron Mackintosh's play Les Mis and to RTD who have inspired me to write this song based fic. I own nothing. Please R/R

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**On My Own….**

_And now I'm all alone again,  
Nowhere to turn, no one to go to.  
Without a home, without a friend,  
Without a face to say hello to._

Rose felt the loneliness standing on the beach of Dårlig Ulv Stranden. Two minutes past and the Doctor was gone out of her life. She threw her face into her hands. Tears came pouring from her face into her hands. She didn't feel that anyone would understand the pain she was feeling at the moment. Her mum couldn't fathom the feelings she had for him. Mickey saw him as a rival and Pete, the alternate dimension version of her father, wasn't her father. How would he understand? And now she was stuck on an Earth that wasn't her home. Her home was back there with the Doctor on the TARDIS.

_And now the night is near,  
Now I can make believe he's here._

Twilight was coming upon the beach. Could she bear this pain, this agony without him? But now she was working with Torchwood, but it wouldn't be the same. However, she could pretend each day that the Doctor was beside her.

_Sometimes I walk alone at night  
When everybody else is sleeping.  
I think of him, and then I'm happy  
With the company I'm keeping.  
The city goes to bed,  
And I can live inside my head._

Her family forced her to go home, away from Dårlig Ulv Stranden. If she had her will she would have stayed there. Those last moments, searing within her chest, when the Doctor said he could not say goodbye properly. Her nights were lonely, and she was in her own world, a world that still existed with him and her. She often would spend time alone. She'd tell her mum and Pete that she was going out.

_On my own,  
Pretending he's beside me.  
All alone,  
I walk with him till morning.  
Without him,  
I feel his arms around me,  
And when I lose my way I close my eyes  
And he has found me._

She spent the time walking around London, imaging the slim profile of the Doctor was beside her. His laughter, his zany jokes, his hugs. With him beside her, she didn't feel so lost upon this strange parallel Earth and it made the heartache seem less.

_In the rain,  
The pavement shines like silver.  
All the lights  
Are misty in the river.  
In the darkness,  
The trees are full of starlight,  
And all I see is him and me for ever and forever._

There was something magical feeling that the Doctor was still alongside her. She dreamed that he was still grasping onto her hand, just like he had done so many times before. She loved him from the first moment he had grasped her hand and told her to "Run." She had told him once, that she wanted to stay with him forever.

_And I know  
It's only in my mind,  
That I'm talking to myself  
And not to him.  
And although I know that he is blind,  
Still I say,  
There's a way for us._

And yet, her heart still aches because, inwardly she knows that it can never be again. The Doctor is somewhere on his TARDIS and she is here. The conversations she has had with him, about her job at Torchwood are only in her mind. But she imagined him, being here grinning and saying that she's amazing. Did he know how much she loved him? Although, she had seen the fear in his eyes once, when he said that humans get old and die, and that he was cursed as a Time Lord to live on. His last words before parting, was he saying that he loved her? Or was he too caught up in his life to even admit that he loved her. Despite the fact that she is caught between dimensions, she holds onto hope thinking perhaps there is still a way for him to love her.

_I love him,  
But when the night is over,  
He is gone,  
The river's just a river.  
Without him,  
The world around me changes.  
The trees are bare and everywhere  
The streets are full of strangers._

He's gone though and nothing seems the same. He made life, so much worth living. Life now seems so ordinary. And the world around her isn't the same. Walking around London, a parallel London, it isn't the same London she knows. Things are off and people that she knew in her dimension do not know her here.

_I love him,  
But every day I'm learning,  
All my life,  
I've only been pretending!  
Without me,  
His world will go on turning,  
A world that's full of happiness  
That I have never known!_

It's not easy trying to learn how to live life all over again on a world that isn't hers. Those two years, those happy two years. Perhaps they had both been imagining that they were in love with each other. Perhaps he has forgotten her. She only knows that somewhere, he's gone on with his life. She knows what his world was like, a wonderful merry life through time and space. It's a life that she can no longer have…..

_I love him...  
I love him...  
I love him...  
But only on my own..._


End file.
